aPpreCiaTiOn

The Truth Hurts and keeps on hurting…
"You just can’t make someone fall in love with
you. You know, you just can’t make them. It’s just
gotta happen. "

"You never know what you have lost till you are
standing in a room with that person not being able
to call them yours."

"Sometimes it’s better to be alone. No one can
hurt you that way."

"Sometimes no matter how long or hard you’ve
loved
someone, they’ll never love you back. And
sometimes you have to be okay with that."

"When you finally realize you don’t matter at all
to someone, you begin to wonder if you matter to
anyone."

"The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting
right beside them knowing you can’t have them."

"Nothing hurts more than giving your all to
someone that gives you NOTHING."

"A sad thing in life is when you meet someone who
means a lot to you, only to find out that it
wasn’t meant to be and you just have to let go.."

"The hardest thing in the world is spending
everyday next to someone you know you’ll never be
close to."

"It’s bad to lose the towel when your eyes are
full of soap, but it’s worse to lose the one you
love when your heart is full of hope."

"I now know that the worst feeling in the world is
not losing the one that you love, but loving the
one that you could never have."

"The worst feeling in the world is to love and
hate a person all in the same second."

"Waking up is hard to do when no one loves you."

"The most hurtful feeling to an
already-broken-hearted girl isn’t to look into the
eyes of the one they love, and have them looking
right past you, but to have them looking at your
best friend."

"Do you know what it’s like to reach for the
phone, and then have to pull your hand back
because you remember you’re not supposed to call
anymore? You sit back with tears building up in
your eyes because you know it’s not the last time
you’ll miss the conversations you shared."

"And all the music in the world cannot mend a
broken heart."

"I hate how you can be in the same room with
someone and not even be able to talk to them."

+is a meaningful post tat i saw from d buletin board..+
it touches my heart so much..esp those tat i hav highlighted..

今天 ，我有很多很多话想对你们大家说。真的很多。昨晚 ，收到老师一封很感动的信息。原来 ，昨晚坐在我隔壁的老师 ， 有那么多话想对我说…看了老师的简讯 ， 我哭了。哭了很久，一直压抑不住自己。很想说，老师 ，谢谢您…还有 ，我知道你们当中向老师通风报信了，那个人是谁，我心里有数..你要不要自首啊？？哈哈…没关系啦。谢谢你们的一番好意。没上网的老师竟然破例“光顾”我的blog，我应该感到光荣吧！
“你一再强调你已不是以前的你，你很努力地坚强，独立，勇敢，我都看到了….可是不可太急。那种压力太大了，成长的过程总有泪水，总有挫折；适当的时候，让我们陪伴你，扶持你…"我知道，这番话，除了老师，还有很多很多的朋友想对我说…对吧？？老师的那几句话，一针见血。一说就说中了我心中最深最深处…这一两年，我真的时时刻刻都在提醒自己，要坚强，要勇敢，我一定可以克服的。可是，我想…我办不到。被老师看穿了，我一直在强迫自己变坚强，变勇敢。事实上，真正的我，根本就办不到。我一直在别人面前装得很坚强。其实，我真的很脆弱，我很胆小，我很容易就受伤。
老师之所以心血来潮”光顾”我的blog，是因为我写的那些话…除了老师，我也收到朋友对我那几句话的感受。友情，现在对我来说，是没有灵魂的。曾几何时，我失去了心灵最真的依靠。我想，我应该在此澄清…我是个很重感情的人，你们应该知道的。我很需要心灵上的依靠。但在我们大家各奔东西后，联络越来越少了，虽然偶尔有见个面…彼此都聊得很愉快，无所不谈…唯一没谈的就是，我们大家心里最深的那些话。我们大家多很忙…我明白，这只是个过度期。翻开纪念册，瑟绮写着"彦怡，我们有这么多人，每个人都有着不同的个性及看法，一定有一个适合你的，所以要把你的事告诉我们，不要压抑在心里。”这个我知道，但是，又有谁有这个时间听我说话，有谁有时间慰问我？？我又是否有时间一一告诉她们？？我知道，当我需要的时候，你们会在那儿等我。但是，真的没有这个时间…这段日子，很难过，很难熬…没有心灵依靠的日子，真的不好受。
中四那年，另一位老师在我的练习簿上写着“身边的人对你的关心是无言的，是用心去感受的，是一种表现，不用说出口。”我想，现在这句话不能用了吧？我们大家都不能天天见面，我们怎能会看见我们对彼此的关心？放在心中我们会看到啊？不是得说出口吗？我想，我们大家都很少会sms彼此说这句话“最近怎样了？一切都好吗？”对吧？大家就只在forward message而已…虽然说，那种信息有的是候符合我们想表达的，但是还是缺乏了那么一点的真诚及感动…
所以，一有机会相聚，就一直谈个不停。就像昨晚，一直不停的说话，本来喉咙就不舒服，但是还是克制不住。还被老师一直说“吃东西了，不要再说了”….够力吧！昨晚感觉真的很棒！！仿佛又回到了中学的时候。我很怀念，以前的日子，就像佩菱你说的，把它们当作是你心灵的依靠吧！想念从前充实的中学生涯。虽然很很忙，很累，至少，心灵不是空虚的；现在，每天的生活就是读书，很累也很忙但不充实，也很空虚。
嗯，想说的，想表达的，应该都说了吧…希望没忘了些什么。最后，真心的谢谢每一位朋友的关心。我感受到的，真的谢谢你们。也谢谢老师。千言万语，一切尽在不言中。

（心　暖了又灰　世界　有时候　孤单的很
需要另一个同类－同类￥孙燕姿〕

Ermmm…since Mr.LKW requested me to write in English , then he
POSTED me a testi , before tat he made us the so-called potato egg sandwich tat
DELICIOUS, then I wrote lorr..hehe..so u must read o!!

Hmmm..few days ago ,As result just released.Its d time again
, where decision has to de made.Time really flies , I feel like just after
finishing my SPM…but now ady in Alevel..somemore going to finish soon…I hate making decision.Moreover , this is d
decision tat will affect my whole life later.Making decision make me think back
of the poem tat we learned in F4..”the road not taken”..haha…I am wondering if I
choose road A now , will I regret in d few years time??or road B is better choice for me??Or road C??how will I know
wat is my future look like??I dun hav great dreams , I dun wanna be doctor ,
lawyer , pharmacist , business woman , sales gal ,teacher…so wat can I do??housewife??haha…so
wat course should I study after my A level??Wat is d life I wan in d future??I
really dunno…I just wanna hav a peace n calm life , without competing with
others…izzit possible to lead a life like tis in d future??

Then , where should I continue my futher studies??stay or
leave??since my mum is planning to migrate , she hope tat I can leave and
graduate elsewhere.Then she can follow me there too…At first , I tot I dun hav
any choice, since she told me tat before I sit for my exam , I tot my only
choice is to leave…But ,few weeks ago , she asked me…Am I willing to let go
everything here n leave??hmmm..such a good ques…but I dunno d answer..is
anything here make me to stay??i am thinking so hard…day n nite…finally ,
concluded tat…NONE….nothing make me feel like staying here after my Alevel.…am
I sound cruel??but is true , frenship??relationship??schoolmates??or wat??for me,
frenship is just a THING wif a shell on it…without soul inside….DISAPPOINTMENT
is d best desription for frenship…after so many things happen in these 2 years , many things had changed..so do u n me…N relationship…haha..no kidding..single now larr…so..sure wont hav any sad or grief feelings when i leave..no one needs me here..maybe no one needs me there too..but..will i feel better if i leave??izzit wise to choose to leave??or stay??haiya…i am in dilemma..anyone can help me??haha..i dun think so…coz..is my future..is my life..i dunwanna to blame anyone later…

so…wat can i do now??wat should i do??can i anyone tell now which one is better in d future??i dun think so lorr…nvm..i think..TIME will tell..time will let me know whether d decision i made now hav made me a better person or not..

gAmbATE evEryOnE..all d best to u all…